Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a condition characterized by difficulties in regulating emotion. This difficulty leads to severe, unstable mood swings, impulsivity and instability, poor self-image and stormy personal relationships. People may make repeated attempts to avoid real or imagined situations of abandonment. The combined result of living with BPD can manifest into destructive behavior, such as self-harm (cutting) or suicide attempts. It’s estimated that 1.6% of the adult U.S. population has BPD but it may be as high as 5.9%. Nearly 75% of people diagnosed with BPD are women, but recent research suggests that men may be almost as frequently affected by BPD. In the past, men with BPD were often misdiagnosed with PTSD or depression.  – See more at: https://www.nami.org/Learn-More/Mental-Health-Conditions/Borderline-Personality-Disorder#sthash.aB5eRBVY.dpuf

In family law cases, husbands (and a smaller percentage of wives) can lead lives filled with uncertainty and despair because of the inability of their partner to engage in a normal relationship.  Marriage is difficult, and as time progresses lives become further intertwined.  Couples have children, buy houses, and as couples age their opportunities decrease.  It is a sad fact of life that people spend many years of their lives in unproductive and, in fact, harmful relationships without ever developing the courage to move on.

Although it is better to never marry someone with BPD, a healthy person must reach a stage where they can and should no longer tolerate the mistreatment that often coincides with living with someone who has BPD.  Having good legal counsel in such a situation who understands the unique dynamic at play is critical.